There Is A Light That Never Goes Out

Gold Panda

Come on, we've all wondered what David Attenborough would look like without any eyes



You can thank me later.

Luigi x

1.

How can I get Raz to watch Gossip Girl?

It Snowed!

Sup peeps.

So me and Luigi went to visit our friend Rebecca on the other side of London today - had a nice lunch at a pub which was SO full of kids i was ready to go Jackie Chan on their ass by the end of it - but i managed to keep calm which is really impressive considering how annoyingly hyperactive the little shits were in there. Anyways it was a pretty cold day - it snowed in the UK - doesn't usually snow this time of year and i hope it doesn't continue snowing cuz it really affects public transport over here since we are somehow still incapable of coping with massive amounts of snow. Nevertheless, it does make everything prettier for about a day or so and provides for some cool picture taking:

Shameless Plugging

oh yeah and I recently got Flickr, I don't quite know how it works but if any of you wonderful blog followers have an account, add/ follow (?) me at: http://www.flickr.com/photos/lou_eve
I promise y'all my photos aren't as weird as my writings.

Much Luigi love x

p.s. let's persuade Raz to sign up too cus Flickr could use her photography skillz, am I right?

oh em gee you guys, it's LUIGI

So... once in a blue moon has come round and I've decided to update the blog. Hello all. Hope everyting is good. We've finished uni for Xmas break which means a month of 'freedom' (new Oxford English dictionary entry for freedom = noun, being overworked with essays despite absence from university) so lucky us. But we graduate in July so proper freedom awaits us then. Yeah yeah yeah.
jk
The other day we went to a gig in an artsy London gallery to see Evermore (Kiwi band, big in Australia and NZ!) and met the band afterwards which was pretty cool. If you haven't heard of them already and like OC-style music, check them out!


Funnily enough the band in this photo is Evermore. (photo=courtesy of that other one, Raz).
jjhj
My tired-ass brain actually has nothing intelligent to say so I'll leave you with this provocative image I took the other week....:
hhhg



Over and out, until next time, which may be several months,
Luigi x

Because

Because a tiger came through the window and started drawing on my wall
Because I fell through a hole in the floor and failed to find my way out
Because the washing machine broke
Because I ran out of yoghurt and my mind became loose with insignificant thoughts of wet flip-flops
Because I didn't have enough time
Because if I told you the truth you would think I was lying
Because the truth is not always paramount
Because when you asked me the question you didn't specify I couldn't lie
Because at the pool they ask you not to dive
Because in some countries they don't care for dancing on ice
Because the icecream melted and trickled down my salty face therefore i am a disgrace
Because as you lost your new phone I found my old place and all the things in it said 'you've changed'

FYI

I hope you've all heard of Dan Meth. If not, you should go bury yourself in autumnal leaves and stay there for atleast 5 mins. Anyway, here's a video of his for you beginners. Also check out his website www.danmeth.com

From me To you.

Oh so you didn't make it to the gig?
Found out your head was too big.

What's that? You can't find your pants
They're probably in the SLUT isle at Tescos
And while you're there, get me some Mentos
And coke for the afterparty.

Deliberately trying to be indiscreet,
Yeh that's so sweet,
Splenda's your kind
Don't forget to save the coupons B.

Had me LMAO-ing all the time,
Isn't hindsight deceiving,
Don't worry i'l be eating,
Just not the same shit as you.

XOXO

WE LOVE Josh's Commute to Work

Josh's Commute to Work: A Tribute to Michael Jackson from 3to1 Studios on Vimeo.

Yeah.

A word of warning guys

Pringles are addictive and they can often make you forget to eat proper lunches and dinners.

A lyric i like

Running to catch up
The last city bus
Wearing out your yellow
Hula dress
Lipstick a mess
Your ch-cherry best
Kissing on the window
Just to check on the red.

from At The Back Of The Shell by The Kills (not The Killers although i like them too)

Hindsight.

Last Wednesday me and my housemates finally decided to stop being lazy and go to THORPE PARK - for those of you not in the U.K, that's a theme park - and it's very near to our house which makes us seem even more like lethargic students. Well anyway, we went on pretty much every ride there was in the park - which seems like the ideal thing to do - but water rides in winter you say? Yes even those. See this is the thing, the first water ride we went on was pretty chillaxed and by that i mean we got a few splashes here and there - everyone was fairly dry. Thus making the whole thing fun and non-threatening. However, after this first taste of water we were fairly pumped and decided to go on a more extreme water ride called Tidal Wave (you'd think the name in itself would be a warning but no we decided to ignore that). Our saner housemate, Cecilia, decided to sit this one out, so me, Ana and Luigi went right ahead. Another thing that should have put us off (but didn't) was the sight of people who had just been on the ride - and were literally dripping wet. So we got in and as soon as you sat down on your seat your bum was immediately soaked from the amount of water that had gone on the seats from the previous turns. Still, we were pretty sure we'd made the right decision. So as soon as the thing plunges downwards and the water makes a splash you think 'Oh that wasn't that bad' - but there's a 3 second pause before you get TOTTALY DRENCHED. To demonstrate the immense nature of this drenching would be to tell you this; Ana had her water-proof coat zipped all the way up but the water still managed to seep under it. But that's not the least of our stupidity. Me and Luigi thought it would be a good idea to go on it again - Ana being slightly wiser than us got off while she could. And since there were no queues (it was a weekday) you didn't have to line up again to go on it a second time, you just got plunged straight back down once you'd come up. This was mine and Luigi's crazy logic - 'We're so wet, we CAN'T possibly get any more wet' - GUESS AGAIN suckers. And fair enough, if it was a sunny summer's day, but no it was mid-autumn chills. So we were pretty much wet for the rest of the day - despite going on numerous roller coasters in a series of attempts to get dry fast. There were various human dryers around the park though - you had to pay £2 for 3 minutes worth of drying which is clearly a rip off but there were these kids with loadsa change who kept topping up the machine so we got a few free goes. But these didn't help, they just made the cold wetness into warm wetness and as soon as you stepped out of them you were pretty freezing again. Here's a picture of us in the futile dryer:

Behind All That Ketchup and Soya Sauce There's Us.

Ana & Me - a combination for sillyness.

Little pink baskets in abandoned winter gardens. How's that for a title?

Hello?
Who is this?
It's Julia.
Who's Julia?
From school, remember?
I don't remember no Julia.
Are you serious? We dated for like 3 months.
What? Is this a prank?
No, you prick, stop playing dumb.
You know what, i'm just gona hang up cuz this is stupid.
You're joking, right?
No I'm not joking, Gooday!
Oh Eff You, alright - you're a loser.
*TooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooT*

We Have A Blog???

OK i'm gona be honest guys, i kinda forgot (and i think Luigi has too as there are no posts from her to prove otherwise) about this whole blogging thing. I think we can be forgiven though cuz for the past two weeks we've had the difficult task of settling back into Uni life and sorting out house shizzle (still no internet). Our landlady is proving to be, quite frankly, annoying. She's so effing attached to the house that she'll notice the smallest things. Like i swear she's in love with the "brand new" wooden flooring as she's always going on about how careful we should be and how much it cost them and that it's BRAND NEW! The other day she came round and noticed the tiniest bumps on the table - so now she's gona take it out of our deposit. She's acting as if though they're the best antique tables in the world and not some cheap IKEA crap! Also she sees herself as such a bloody professional and yet it took her 2 weeks to provide the most basic of items - kettle and toaster! Arghh glad that's off my chest. In other news third year uni has been pretty good so far - but i'm guessin that's because i haven't had to do any essays yet, just LOADS of reading. But i'm used to that. We had our housewarming party on Friday - that was really good despite the stress of preparing for it. One too many drinks for me though, i think i'll lay off the alcohol for a while. So yeh i think that counts as a blog post so i'm gona sign out cuz i have masses and masses of Chaucer and Hegel reading to do and a stupid cold which means my attention span is even shorter than usual.
PEACE x

WARNING: rant

So amidst all these dreams, there is ofcourse reality. The reality that right now we don't have internet at home. The reality that Fresher's Week is already over and the serious stuff begins next week. The reality that there is no longer a cat we can stroke. The shit reality that we are gona be more broke and stressed than ever. The crap reality that we are gona lose a lot of sleep which means less dreaming and even more dull REALITY*.



*Reality liable to change. Now breathe.

As Deep As This Blog Will Get

So I was flicking through my notebook today when i came across this entry from Luigi which made me laugh:

Luigi's dream 14/06/09

Raz was on msn to me confessing all of her embarassing habits, starting off with burping. As the habits became gradually more unpleasant, Raz decided to send me her last (and worst) one via email, as she feared my response. The email said 'sometimes I fart.'

Creepy Cat Portrait

Poser

I'm that poser you hate,
I'm that poser you love,
I'm that poser you date,
I'm that poser you shove,
I'm that poser motherfucker doing the handstand on the water,
Doing the back flips on your mother's car,
Talking to birds cuz they understand me,
I'm that poser,
Come a little closer, I have the petrol
you gots the lighter so lets watch jealousy burn, burn, burn.

Hot dang

Here's my desktop background for all those who are undoubtedly massively interested. I took this photo of my dog Jasper last spring but he's still dressed like this now.

Love Luigi and Jasper xxx

feel the love!

Well hello there.

Raz is away for a few days so I’m responsible for the blog until she gets back. I know, major responsibility, lets hope I can cope. Anyway I was reading The Times yesterday and came across the poor old dating column thing (lonely hearts is it?) and no, before you start feeling sympathetic, this isn’t leading to a confession that I was searching for a potential lover. I was amusing myself with the odd and slightly pitiable things people had written, my favourite being ‘well-trained, tall, attractive Libran looking for new Kennel. House trained and affectionate. Good coat and teeth, worth rescuing. 1950s model, Norfolk’, although I’m not sure whether it’s witty or just plain stupid. And so, because it’s free to place an ad (and because I thought it would be really quite funny) I decided I’d submit my own which goes something like this:

‘I like big butts on my ideal guys! Obese mama, 42, likes eating out, take away or even drive thru if that’s what you’re into. Seeks man with similar curves. If your BMI is 27+ call me now. Ldn/ Herts”

Now we wait for the people at The Times to publish this heart-wrenching plea for love.

Others I’d considered include:

‘Mr Muscle, bathroom cleaner and general do-gooder. Once I rescued a cat for Mrs Mc Ginty and won ‘most likely to rescue a cat’, in that order. I am in between jobs but on the plus side my mother's on her death bed. Helllllo inheritance. I’m 33 and weigh 109 pounds. S. Wales’ ....or ‘Jeckyll or Hyde? You decide. I am a kind hearted 47 year old male interested in gardening and volunteering. Sometimes I kill mice and sacrifice them to the devil but this is occasional. If you want a selfless, kind, split personality, wife beating, musical partner, I’m your guy!! Don’t f***ing call me on this number, many thanks. Glasgow.’

I would.

2 Girls 1 Cup - Ana's reaction

I'm sure you've all seen the video in question folks - it's pretty disgusting - but the reaction videos never fail to make me laugh. Here's our friend Ana's reaction. I forgot to put this up months ago but better late than never i guess. Enjoy.

2 girls 1 cup - Ana's reaction from Raz Barzinji on Vimeo.

Cool song I heard today

I´ll kill her from Joerg Barton on Vimeo.

nobody lost, nobody found

G’afternoon all!

So I am back in London after spending some weeks away on holidai, and, to be honest, I kind of want to emigrate. It’s not that I don’t like England – I’m sure everyone feels a little disheartened when they come back home after a great holiday – but I’m a bit bored of the same old same old, and London can only offer so much after nearly 16 years here. This outlook of change prompted me to consider my future, at which point I became depressed, as I still have no solid career plans and only one year at university left to decide. ARGHHHH. I’ve considered several possibilities including journalism and working in an embassy but neither have really got that massive appeal anymore. So, after much thought, I’ve decided it’s probably best to employ someone to determine what would be best for me in the employment field. Raz refused this position on the grounds that it was too boring and held much responsibility for her, so I’m instead going to shamelessly advertise here in the blog and probably also in some crappy paper like the London Lite/ Metro. Tube commuters know best and all that.
Here are my employable attributes:
1) I can read
2) I like most fruit bar watermelon and prunes (?)
3) I like to travel
4) I speak no Spanish
5) I can use Excel spreadsheets
6) I have a good sense of direction

That should be enough.
God help me.
Love from the one that ain’t Raz


p.s. please find attached my photo, I hope this furthers my job opportunities

Follower interest : Low

Either that or no one really cares about my latest poll. Just tryna get a rough idea about the state of our follower's humble abodes. So vote and don't lie.

Love y'all

It ain't Coca-Cola it's rice

I've been kinda bored recently. Gota a load of parcels from the web today - it's always exciting when your web orders arrive. I ripped through the packaging like some kinda cardboard-monster. I had some sorta allergic reaction to something i ate. Can't pinpoint which food exactly. It was either those Percy Pig and Pals sweets or Chicken Noodles - or maybe when the two are mixed - that's not to say i have some sorta sick food fetish - i just happened to have those two things one after the other. Well anyway it made my throat itchy and my tongue kinda got a bit swollen - not so swollen that i had trouble speaking - but it was slightly visible. I got all panicked cuz i thought that my throat would swell up so i wouldn't be able to breathe. I started reading all kinda bullshit on the net. Some person on a forum said that they woke up one morning with an itchy swollen jaw. This freaked me out. I didn't sleep very well that night. Understandeably the first thing i did when i got up that morning was touch my face to check i hadn't transformed into the Elephant Man overnight. I hadn't. That was a relief.
Enough allergy talk. I have decided to get back into swimming - actually scrap that - I have decided to get into swimming - i don't think i was ever into it. I haven't been near a pool since secondary school - so that's 4 years!!! Back then i only went cuz it was compulsory but still i managed to skip a lot of those classes - i should have won some sorta award for the amount of P.E notes i faked. It's kinda easier for girls with the whole period excuse - still, you can't exactly say that every week - God knows i tried. So yeh i went a bit mental with the swimming gear - i ordered goggles, caps, ear plugs - yeh i went all out. For the amount it's cost me I better like this whole water business. My friend kinda put me off the other day - telling me about a whole buncha people who had drowned. Talking of morbid circumstances - me and the fam went to eat out at some restaurant the other day and on the table behind us was a decent looking family - but their lunatic son kept going on about horrific injuries, murders and suicides. Bloody killed the whole mood. But the food there was effing ace so it made up for it. It's called Olive Tree and it's a Greek restaurant in Finsbury Park. Y'all should check it out. Anways folks that's all I have to say or more truthfully that's all i could be bothered to type.
Love Razzle x

Calcium is good for you

More Tightened Restrictions

Tightened Restrictions

Stumbling hunchbacks with flailing arms are not permitted in this joint

Sunglasses

It was around November last year when myself and Luigi found ourselves on the net browsing for necessities for our upcoming house party that we came across this video.



It cracked us up at the time and still makes us laugh to this day, despite having slightly over-played it at the beginning. As the video progresses you realise that both the interviewer and the interviewee are equally stupid which results in some of the most stupid words to have ever been put together in a sentence such as "I'll say sorry, but I'm not taking off my glasses". This quote has even made it onto a Tshirt which I shall be buying for Luigi as a Birthday present

a hug in a mug?

I drank this whilst listening to The Clash. What's that word? Juxtaposition.

Yes please!

I'm sure you'll find this very interesting

Things on my wall from Raz Barzinji on Vimeo.

uh that's not the point

Stupid questions = interesting answers, mostly.

So Raz and I were supposed to be directing guests' vehicles to various car parks across the campus during our uni's Graduation Week. These guests were predominantly parents and grandparents of the graduates, so a serious crowd.

What we ended up doing was asking these guests whether they'd already seen Bruno (the film) yet, instead of telling them where to park.

Here are some of the responses Luigi got to "have you seen Bruno?":

1) Elderly Chinese grandfather in broken English: "uh, sorry, uhh no, not Bruno, who is Bruno?" and middle aged Chinese guy in passenger seat says triumphantly: "no....but I have the Borat ringtone!"

2) Typical, middle class English family: [looking frustrated and confused] "What? Look where can we park please?"

3) Random female member of staff: "WHO?"

4) Middle aged father: "I haven't, no. But wait my daughter has!" [daughter and mother nod enthusiastically]

5) And our boss, Richard, completely dismissed the question.

We want to know if YOU have seen Bruno yet (or if you're planning to), and if so did you liiiiiiiiike it?

So I ran......

So I ran and ran and ran until I could run no more, and when I finally came to a halt I could smell the sea, the sun, the tigers and their cubs all at once. I took it in but then I exhaled and vowed to never inhale again. This was it. I wanted nothing more to do with Oxygen. My thoughts ran weak, and I could tell from the way the sky sneered that it was all coming to a miserable end. An end that was more photogenic than I could have imagined. It was beautiful in a very vicious way. A calm yet chaotic demise with no witnesses but pure thought. What was I to do? Take a picture? Write a note? What difference does it make? It will all be lost and forgotten. And yet a part of me wanted to document this tragedy for whatever reason the hindsight of death may offer. Just incase. You know. Just in case.

empty threats?

This is what Raz said she would do to ME if I didn't contribute something to the blog:

The Watermelon Kid

All jokes aside

Since Bob's your uncle, I have reached the end of my tether and have therefore decided to give him a piece of my mind. But since a picture is worth a thousand words I shall show him this instead. He will then turn into a pot and start calling the kettle black. No worries though cuz I have a few tricks up my sleeve and lord knows it will start raining cats and dogs before I'm done with that sheep in wolf's clothing. Yet I will not compromise my dignity for I have bigger fish to fry and I think it will be best if he just hit the sack.

In a lazy mood

so here is a video featuring Jacko and my wacko family.

http://vimeo.com/5348092

The last few days in pictures

Me and sis met up in Trafalgar Square.
Loads of peope had drawn their flags on the pavement.
Sadly there was no chalk left for us to draw the Kurdish flag.









Then me and Ana went to see The Hangover. After the film, we just chilled out near the fountains in Trafalgar Square.

Yesterday I met Rebecca in Oxford St for a drink. I bought this Jumper from American Apparel which I'm in love with. Rebecca hates American Apparel though. She has yet to see the light. I also bought JELLY BEANS from Hamleys. Love jelly beans. I applied for a job there as well cuz all you do is demonstrate cool toys to kids. How fun is that. Seriously best job ever.

Here is a Rhyme.

Donnie is in Dover
eating all the clover,
Susie is in class
looking at Mike's ass,
Sarah is out shopping
for her pizza topping,
Harry is doing sit-ups
before signing his pre-nups,
Laura is missing
but no one here is looking,
Courtney is talking gibberish
and her breath smells like liquorice,
I am here writing
so don't you be hating!

British Mode

7 phrases/ events that have shaped my life (my week)

1) Monday = sports science: I met a fine chap who told me he studied sports science. This prompted me to consider and appreciate that not all people who study sports are stupid if there’s some science involved. But alas this guy was stupid anyway so my original theory was proved, in him at least.
2) Tuesday = BBQ: I went to my friends’ one and ended up eating macaroni cheese. That’s democracy for you.
3) Wednesday = volunteering choices: I opted out of bathing old people and chose secretarial stuff instead, although I have a hunch that I may come to regret this in later life.
4) Thursday = BNP: THAT racist party. Yes, the ones who liken rape to force feeding a woman chocolate cake (it’s wrong but they like it anyway) and vehemently deny the Holocaust ever happened. (for all the non-UK readers, unfortunately I’m not making this up, the BNP does actually exist: http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/group.php?gid=8644741474&ref=nf) They somehow managed to secure two seats in the European parliament, I am truly disgusted by the Brits who voted them in.
5) Friday = chocolate éclairs: I ate 6 that day, so the effect probably did shape me literally in the rotund sense
6) Saturday = drunk man: at about 1pm I spotted a drunk Scot stumbling around Portobello market, he asked for my name and I nearly took a photo but after considering the possibly unpleasant/ violent consequences, decided against the idea
7) Sunday = shisha: made plans with an old friend and agreed to let him take me to a shisha bar sometime next week, I am full of anticipation. Also I hope I don’t die from strange substance inhalation, will update you laterino

Next time I'll post a photo of Razzy and myself dressed as Russian Babushkas.

Love, as always, from Luigi x

No luck yet

I am seriously getting pissed off, cuz it seems as though no one is willing to give me a job. All I want is some summer work experience, damnit! Anywho I will remain hopeful, as hopeful as one can remain in these times. But fuck that. I want a job and I want it now. YOU HEAR ME? Course you don't. And to make matters worse, there is no sun. It's gone and it's been replaced by miserable droplets of acid rain. This town is a joke.

On the edge of bordeom

Photo of the day

Cat - Dog Dialogue

The Dog : Carpe Diem my friend.

The Cat : Fuck off!

Photo of the day

Leaving Egm for LDN

So this is kinda mine and Luigi's last time properly living at 64 Beechtree....we'll be back for visits and to move the rest of the stuff out in a few months but apart from that THIS IS IT! So wow, we've had some good memories at this place, even if we were critical of it at times. Most of all I think we'll miss Andy. It is gona be a definite struggle when we move into our new house and there is no Andy to sroke. It will be a period of mourning. Having said that, we are all very excited about next year. We like our new house and our new garden is far superior to the one we have now. So to celebrate we shall be having loads of bbq's. And now I shall proceed with my packing......ahhh ALAS.

News...

Following a visit from the cat burglar, residents at Beechtree Avenue have now taken extra precautions to hide their purses and their cats. The break-in took place on Sunday and was said to have been the most news-worthy story in the area for over a century. One local man described the incident as "absolutely spectacular" when asked to expand, he simply said "yes". Most of the inhabitants are old and are therefore hard of hearing, hence explaining their nonsensical answers. Police declared today that the suspect is of Caucasian influence however it being an entirely White town, this information has now been dismissed as useless.

This is you looking at me.

I must have passed out.

You have one new message.

Let this be a lesson to you.

I can't find my ticket.

I use Baby Johnson.

Ewwww mould.

When is your birthday?

It's only £3.50.

She is blatantly gonna win.

Wanna play a card game.

I finished series one.

Sausage and Mash.

Just adding to my postcard collection.

What's the time?

I was not ready for this weather.

Coca-Cola.

Last bus was at 18.30.

Me and Kurt.

Is there some sorta exercise for bladder strength?

Grease stains on wood.

Lets talk.

TV Juice

Hey Y'all,

So this 3-legged creature that me and Luigi always go on about - the one who is inappropriately named Andy = the ginger cat. Well he ended up on the roof somehow and here is the footage.

P.S hope everyone's summer is going well thus far :D

So the apple said to the caterpillar

sheesh y'all

I have noticed that We Don't Play Guitars has been lacking in blog posts nowadays....mainly due to exam priorities. And my God, isn't revision just the dullest thing? Yes, yes it is. Now onto more significant, and some might say, more interesting matters......the weekly shopping. This is where a group of housemates take turns on the computer and browse Tesco Online for food that they might need that week. It might be a loaf of bread or it might be some oven chips....but one thing is for sure - they will forget some items. Now this week I forgot quite a lot of items which resulted in me having to purchase them on the night we went out to a local bar. Now, I know what you're all thinking - dirty, pervy thoughts - but that's beside the point. Anyways so I had to buy a whole lotta stuff and carry it around with me in an unglamorous plastic bag......certainly not fit for a bar. Luckily our housemate Cecilia was carrying a big bag that night so she helped to lighten the burden a bit. I know you're all dying to know so here's what I had forgotten:

-Cheese (Cheddar)
-Cheese strings
-Shampoo & Conditioner
-Deodorant
-and some bin bags (which was more of a house issue)

Our time at the bar, named the Slug and Lettuce, was highly enjoyable. We sat outside by the riverside for the first half of the evening - which was frequently interrupted by a group of people on a boat who took turns pushing each other overboard, which at first was slightly entertaining but then just got annoying. Oh and I was also coaxed into acting out various facial expressions according to what my housemates shouted out....and thus resulted in a series of embarrassing photos on my camera. These shots, however funny or hilarious will not be published for the sake of those involved. All in all it was a good night but to be honest with y'all I should really be revising right now and not reminiscing......

Peace x

You've got to go steal a ham

So everyone has been reunited at Beechtree as of yesterday, and we're all working real hard on various projects relative to our degrees. Raz is examining insects' genitalia, Ana is working on her Hitchcock essay, Kate's watching a French film and C is....well she's doing God knows what, but we trust her. I have hiccups at present which is ever so frustrating, and I'm trying to revise some awful literature whilst writing about Spain. Andy is downstairs but is shedding fur faster than Raz devours a jar of olives, we're kinda reluctant to touch him. Raz had a hairbrain idea to 'wax' him using selotape to stop this problem but this failed and Andy got a bit annoyed...so we're all at a loss.

EXAMS start for us this week, Raz's start tomorrow (mwahaha) and I start on Fri but I have double the exams she does so according to Einstein's theory............I think we're even. Raz needs AAA batteries for her electronic dictionary btw, so if you have any they'd be greatly appreciated.

In other news Swine Flu is on the increase so Raz is warning the house not to buy bacon. Some of us did anyway but we can assure you it did not come from Mexico. Why is Danish bacon so special??? Does anyone know if cats can contract the disease?????

I have nothing else of interest to say today as my inspiration has been drained. I'd like some of you to pester Raz to write the next entry because...it's been a while since we've heard her words of wisdom! I'm beginning to question her commitment to the project, might have to change the blog to 'Luigi don't play guitars' unless she gets her ass out the dustbin and writes something GOOD!

Luigi x

There's a party in my belly button

Now Raz and myself may tend to exaggerate for dramatic effect, but here are some home truths (they are the truth) about us which you probably do not know.

Number a) neither of us can drive, if we were to drive I'd be in an eco friendly hybrid car and Raz would probably be in a cool retro car of the last Millenium or a gaz-guzzling Land Rover
b) we are both second year students at uni but neither of us know fo sho what we want to do 'when we grow up'...
c) neither of us drink coffee because we both get headaches of the painful variety
d) neither of us are actually FROM north London, but we've lived there longtym
e) we both like photography but we have very different styles. (Maybe we should upload more of our stuff?)
f) we kind of fit into the Howard/Vince complex (for those of you who don't know these guys, check out The Mighty Boosh on YouTube) Howard = me, Vince = Raz (to a certain extent)
g) we like Twitter
h) we're both really into politics and have a strong inexplicable attraction to Gordon Brown
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ok there's one lie in there but which is it??

Peace out, and in the words of Benjamin Franklin, GOOD DAY SIRS

Luigi and Raz xxx

So much for that inspiring article

Dear everybody,
Following Sir_Almo's self-publicising (ahaha) on Twitter I decided to take note and promote this really cool London band. So, if you do one thing today, DON'T donate to LiveAid and DON'T sponsor a donkey, listen to Bloc Party. Btw these guys have been my favourite band for +5years so think twice before you criticise them.......not that you'll find reason to criticise them. Just don't listen to Raz on this one, she has the flu so her judgement has been temporarily corrupted. So yeah, check them out below!!!
Lots of love from Luigi xxx
P.S let's all wish Raz a speedy recovery :)

Twitter

Hi folks,

Me and Luigi have recently been engulfed by the Twitter bug so check us out if you are on there....just show some support God Damnit. Here are our carefully chosen alias ID's - it's TheRazz for moi and Luigles for guess who. And if you are disgusted by this shameless advertising, so you should be.

Love you's
xxx

Your ass is on FIRE! (RE: letter to my friend)

Dear Luigi,
I understand that times are difficult - Obama is stuck up a tree and Gordon Brown thinks he's a vampire - but that is no reason for you to make rash decisions such as that you have mentioned in your carefully crafted letter. I fear my life will go strange and awful places if you truly decide to become a nun. Nevertheless, I believe that the Sun has spoken in bright rays of nuggets of warm knowledge, and in the words of Elton John "DON'T RUIN MY TROUSERS" I beg you to reconsider. Having said that, deep down inside I believe this decision will be good for the both of us and so do my dogs. Listening to the birds tweet on a Tuesday morning is not a pretty sight but by God i've learnt to live with it, and maybe I'll learn to live with this. Bruce Forsythe sends his love, and has vowed to replace you as my lover from now on. I kindly reject this offer taking into account his clown feet and his big, pervy ancient binoculars. The time has come for me to wrap this up so I'll sign off with the precious philosophy of Elton John "Don't hurt those you love by making stupid decisions that don't even make sense yeh you stupid piece-a-shit, you lousy so and so"

Love Razzle

Mercury's in Retrograde (a letter to my friend)

Dear Raz,

I don't really know how to tell you this, I’m joining the Convent. I think I realised it when you smacked my ass at the Elton John concert and I saw you hit on the Catholic priest. I'm sure you're middle-class enough to understand that I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning your Hannah Montana underwear to you, but I'll keep your suicide note as a memory. You should also know that I never will forget that night and I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon.

Greetings to your frog Leonard,

Luigi x

the problem with onions.....and some delicious facts

they make me cry, they give me smelly breath, they isolate me from others, they think they are better than garlic, they do not have any sympathy, they can cause damage to the cornea, they mock your sensitivity, they exasperate lions.

Some facts about onions:
-In ancient Greece athletes ate lots of onions to lighten the balance of the blood
-During the Middle Ages, physcicians prescribed onions to alleviate headaches, snakebites and even hair loss
-onions were so important to Europeans that they used them as currency in the Middle Ages to pay for essentials such as rent. They were even given as gifts.

(by the way guys I am not talking gibberish, I found this info on a crop sheet about onions)

Acceptable in the 80's

A list of things that happened or were acceptable in the 80's:

- shoulder pads
- leg warmers
- plastic bags
- aerosol sprays
- clashing colours
- big, frizzy hair (I still carry this trend due to my Kurdish genes)
- slapping people every second friday of the month
- WHAM!
- jelly drinks (still available in our college shop)
- swearing at kids
- abusing colour
- Mohican
- Brylcreem
- MJ gloves
- the moonwalk
- homosexuality was considered a disease
- people used to think Car Wash's were a fun ride
- the hip-hop scene evolved
- me and Luigi were born to the delight of our blog followers
- doing the box in the club
- bandanas
- leotards
- Rubix cube
- David Bowie make-up
- using brocolli as an item of clothing
- Freddie Mercury moustache
- poop bags
- slapping other people's kids
- smashing plates
- peeping on your neighbours through a discreet hole in the wall
- sheep shagging
- men wearing tight short-shorts
- the colour orange

this list is welcome to suggestions :)

This aint't right

Listen, people if you're cool then you'll do the right thing and vote for me - Raz. I shall not be bribing anyone like Luigi since this is not cool. To conclude, I think you're all pretty cool for not giving a f*ck!

We hope all our followers are happy and if we could we would hug the shits out of you cuz your all such beautiful people, we love you all very much. Mwah Mwah Mwah

Shocky Rocky Horror

GUYS!! Come on, I'm not impressed with the poll result so far, the ONLY vote has gone to Raz, although I'm convinced she paid Bob's your uncle to vote for her. Sort it out. Everyone knows any girl pretending to be a guy called Luigi is worth something in the cool stakes!

Free pizzas to all who vote. (for me of course)

Luigi xxx

p.s. I thought you should all know, I set this as my profile picture on Facebook and it caused quite a stir....

An improvement, no?

Tales of Uranus

Good day to you! We appreciate that we have been crap at blogging recently and need to update you guys with our life happenings more often. So here we go. (This is Luigi by the by)

I skipped a German lecture on Brecht today and slept instead. I think Raz is still asleep downstairs (at 1pm). It’s sunny in England!! Spring is here I think, yesterday I had a picnic with a friend and did no work, good times. Raz and the rest of the house went to Richmond (gorgeous place just inside London, a bit posh) for a meal and drinks last night, I have yet to hear how it went, but I think they had a blast. From the past.

We entered some photos into an exhibition at our university (fire and water), the results are tomorrow, we hope we win something, even if it’s just some smoke and dry ice. We will post some of our submitted photos tomorrow. They are quite spectacular if you like Mother Nature and simple things.

Andy has been on a bite fest recently, attacking the locals and biting my housemates (he didn’t bite me though, go figure) and we have concluded that this is because either a) he needs attention or b) because he’s hungry and only the taste of human flesh satisfies him these days. I hope it’s the latter.

Both Raz and I have received quite a bit of unwanted attention from 2 males recently, I am suffering because my guy does the same course as me and I can’t ever seem to get away from him. He has been refused but remains hopeful. Raz’s guy is perhaps even more keen as all he did was rub some facemask on her hand before he was convinced it was love and now is persistently emailing her. After many obvious hints these guys still don’t seem to get the message, does anyone have any suggestions of how we can rid them FOR GOOD??

In other news, George Michael is set to play Maria in The Sound of Music this term for 6 weeks. Tickets on sale now. Raz has turned into a pretentious artiste, but I have a feeling this is just a phase.

Last week it was Lager Lout

Love Luigi and Raz xxx