Photo of the day: (Luigi: Russell Square, London)
Today’s news stories:
- Sergeant Pepper’s credit card has been refused AGAIN. However he is denying the matter to improve staff morale.
- Broccoli has been rumoured to contain traces of peanut juice after having caused several attacks on nut allergy-sufferers in Taiwan.
- Environmental protestors in central London have been told to “shove off” by Gordon Brown after accidentally tying themselves to Gordon’s wife in an attempt to separate the couple on Valentine’s Day. It is believed the protestors used duct tape and animalistic rituals.
- Miss Marple has failed to solve any crimes recently so has been made temporarily redundant. In the meantime she is working in Shoezone, although she is apparently of little use.
- Sergeant Pepper’s credit card has been refused AGAIN. However he is denying the matter to improve staff morale.
- Broccoli has been rumoured to contain traces of peanut juice after having caused several attacks on nut allergy-sufferers in Taiwan.
- Environmental protestors in central London have been told to “shove off” by Gordon Brown after accidentally tying themselves to Gordon’s wife in an attempt to separate the couple on Valentine’s Day. It is believed the protestors used duct tape and animalistic rituals.
- Miss Marple has failed to solve any crimes recently so has been made temporarily redundant. In the meantime she is working in Shoezone, although she is apparently of little use.
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